Cleaning the Master Bedroom, Part 1 (Updated)

This is a slightly revised version of my previous article published in September, 2013.

When you are recovering from a flare or additional illness, give yourself a break.  You have to have a recuperation period.  Trying to do too much in one day will slow down your recovery,  therefore, I expect you to use common sense.  Pay more attention to pacing yourself and resting.  This does not have to be a perfectly thorough cleaning.  We will be coming back to our rooms again.  Do what you can do, and let it rest.  Be happy you were able to make a dent in the house work.

Your main goal and my main goal are to make improvements in our master bedrooms this week.  Of course, you always have the choice to devote your time and energy somewhere else, and I applaud that choice, because we are not all messy in the same places.  However, if you always leave your bedroom for last, try to spend some special time on it this week.

Before I list the suggestions for working in your room, I want to tell you what happened to me as I worked in my room.  Even though I had my room on my list several times in the last few weeks, I had only managed to make tiny little inroads.  I had dusting on my list.  It was not getting dusted, until this Saturday.  I also planned to wash the bedspread, change the sheets, and wash the dog, all in the same day.  Then, I added using furniture polish after I got off the dust.  The dust was thick:  I do not remember the last time I dusted the bedroom.  Yep!  It is said confession is good for the soul:  there it is.  

I used my timer.  I rested in between, and I still managed to overdo.  Last night the Fibro pain was all over my body.  Even my sternum hurt.  I could not go to sleep, and when my body finally told me it was ready to sleep, I threw up my medicine.  I had to get a basin and sit in my recliner with a towel over it, because I was too tired to stand up. I know this is icky, but I don't know any better way to remind you to take care of yourself.  Therefore, I slept in my recliner last night.

This is a warning and a suggestion, because you are only one that can manage your own body.  And even then, your body probably doesn't always cooperate.  However, when you pace yourself and do not try to get everything done in one day, things happen in the house.  And you can have energy left for tomorrow.  I have been doing well in that regard, until yesterday, when I became over-enthusiastic and got in a hurry.

This is a repeatable method of cleaning.  Remember, you are only to spend 15 minutes or less, depending on your strength to do these jobs.  If it takes you the whole week to do Days 1 and 2, that is acceptable.  If you want to make the master bedroom your chore for the day and your 15 minutes of decluttering, while you only tend to basics elsewhere, that is OK.  However, if you tend to this job as listed, you will end up with a reasonably clean bedroom. 

Cleaning the Master Bedroom  

(Nearby, have boxes, baskets or hampers marked throw away, give away, put away.)   

• Day 1  Pick up any clothes lying on the furniture or floors, that includes shoes. Put clean clothes away, put dirty clothes in the clothes basket or washing machine, and put your shoes where they belong.
• Day 2  Clean trash off the dressers and bedside tables.  Use your marked hampers, baskets, or boxes.   
• Day 3  Now, you can dust.  If it has been a while you may need more than one cloth or Swiffer.  Microfiber dusters and cloths work well too, because they are washable, as well as holding a good amount of dust.  A vacuum cleaning wand or an ostrich feather duster works well on lampshades.  If you tend to be obsessive, let it go.  You will only exhaust yourself, and most likely end up procrastinating.  Set your timer, and let the perfectionism go. 
• Day 4  If you did not wash your sheets after raising all that dust, it is time to change your sheets.  Get some help shaking out your bedspread if you are not going to wash it.  Sunlight will kill mites, so the old fashioned clothes line can be a plus.  I found a spray that will kill dust mites and not harm you.  I also read that vinegar and baking soda will kill dust mites, but I cannot find the proper solution.  If you are not allergic to dust mites or you have lots of static electricity in your home, I would not worry about the little critters. However, they definitely die when you wash those sheets and dry them in the dryer.

Pace yourself.  

You are making an improvement, not going for perfection.  When I put pictures of done rooms on here, you are seeing what the photographer wants you to see.  Can you see the basket of clean clothes sitting in a corner waiting to be put away?  No! Can you see the dog hair that is sitting at the baseboard where it was missed?  No.  

I plan to post Part 2 on Tuesday.

Have a good week!  Hugs, Deborah

Working at Your Energy Level

When inactivity is about to drive you crazy, and you have to do some housework or bust, jump in gradually.

Guess what!  Today, I actually got some work done:  Laundry Basket Emptied, Laundry Dried and Folded, Washed the Coffee Pot -- it tastes better if those old oils are washed off, and I spent time decluttering a drawer.  I would like to dust;  but my ear infection has been so bad and I have so much yucky stuff still in my head, I need to buy some masks to wear or make my own washable masks. 

When trying to return to your normal activity level, rest in between jobs.

I rested between everything I did.  I did not work for 15 minutes at a time, because my body made it obvious it is not back.  I could feel the weakness and lack of energy;  however, even with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, the muscles will become weaker if not used.  Those of us with ME/CFS walk a fine line between using our muscles and not over exerting ourselves.  We need to use our muscles, then rest.  

Smile.  You accomplished something!  Then, relax and sleep well (hopefully).

I find myself more comfortable with myself if I put in a little effort, according to what I am able to do at the time.  I cannot always be thinking of myself as behind, because that is an indicator I have unrealistic expectations of what I should be doing.  I have also found I sleep better if I am active;  however, if I do more than my body is able to do at the time, I often end up unable to sleep. The fine line I do not want to cross is always there. So what is the best way to know when to stop?

Learn to listen to your body.  It will tell you when to rest if you listen.

I wish I had a magic formula to give you;  however, there is none that I know of.  This is a self-learned, trial and error ability.  Often, one runs into problems when the adrenaline rush of expecting company or wanting to do something so very much, he or she ignores the warning signs that pop up.

1. How do you know when you need to rest?  
2. Have you learned to work in short spurts with rest periods?

10 Things To Do When You Are Dragging More Than Usual...

The new year seems like a time to jump in, to fire up the burners, and get going;  but, in reality, dealing with a chronic illness may leave you feeling deflated from all the activity during the Thanksgiving and Christmas season.  Even though you may look back with a grateful heart in remembering that time, it does not change that you probably expended more energy being out of your normal routine.  

Today, I'm not going to take the time to  talk about some of the things that can drain us of energy.  But, I would like to list some things to help us get back on track.  I say "us", because I am writing this to me too.  January and February have been slow months for me for quite a few years.  I have noticed 
a pattern, and I think this may be true for many of us. 

Image Courtesy of [-Marcus]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

When you are dragging more than usual, you can try...

1. Making a shorter list of things to do.
2. Listing 3 things to do, instead of 6 or 7.
3. Breaking big jobs into smaller increments.
4. Spending no more than 15 minutes on a chore -- rest -- then, finish.
5. Delegating small jobs to other family members with age appropriate activities, letting them know how much they are contributing to family life. (This is great training for children.)
6. Celebrating the things you are able to get done.
7. Getting off your feet, and taking a break.
8. Speaking to yourself with positive thoughts.  Don't let the negative take over.
9. Slowing down, doing something you enjoy.
10. Sitting by the fire.

Image Courtesy of [artur84]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I hope this helps.

Hugs, 

Deborah

When Christmas Is Only Six Days Away

Image Courtesy of [David Castillo]
/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Last October and November, you may have felt like getting ready for Christmas was under control. Maybe, you still do;  however, many of you may feel like life and illness are spinning out of control.  

What do you do if you know you are already getting overtired, as well as suffering from sensory overload from too many Christmas parties or too much shopping.  Here are some suggestions for getting through the holidays and still enjoying them.  Just pick and choose what will work for you in your situation. 

 A Reminder:  You all are in different stages of illness and recovery.  Many of you have overlapping illnesses, and this has a huge impact on what you are able to do.  There are some people reading this who cannot figure out why they feel good one day and horrible the next.  Furthermore, FM and CFS/ME are not the only illnesses that drain energy

Here are ten ideas to keep you more relaxed through the holidays;  even though, Christmas is only six days away. 

1. Remember to use your timer.  Do chores in increments of 5 to 15 minutes.
2. Rest frequently.
3. Remember "The Principle of Three."  Your daily to-do list of things you want to get done should consist of three things.
4. Haven't decorated yet?  Keep decorations light.
5. You haven't had the energy to send out Christmas cards.  That's OK. Send the have to's:  close relatives, best friends and your boss.  You still want to connect to more friends?  Don't forget Facebook.  You can wish them a "Merry Christmas."  online.  Send out a New Year's card or letter. It's okay to deviate from some of those man-made  traditions.  Or horrors of horrors  (Gasps are heard)  don't send out Christmas or New Year's greetings. 
6. Shift your gift-giving mindset to remembering it really is the thought that counts.  
7. If you wrap one or two gifts at a time, it is less tiring.  
8. Gift bags are the easy way to package gifts for giving.
9. Use short-cuts for food preparation.  Easy meals are a blessing this time of year.  Moreover, it is refreshing to eat simple food rather than eating too much rich food. 
10. The single most important thing is to take some time to just breathe. Meditate on the meaning of Christmas.  Enjoy doing something that rests you.  Let God refresh your soul:  He will if you ask. 

 

Merry Christmas!

Finally, God bless you:  You are never far from my mind. 

Deborah

*Snowman image courtesy of [Feelart]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net


P.S.  I apologize for not having more posts.  I am having a hard time getting used to this keyboard and having such a sensitive mouse pad.  I delete things by accident.  My letters jump into the middle of other sensitives, and all I know is it must be user error.  Eventually, I may have to get an external keyboard and mouse so I can type at my usual rate of speed.

However, I am learning to use this computer in little tiny baby steps.  Tonight, I deleted my Libraries, because they did not work.  I kept getting this message it was safe to delete them.  I did.  Then, I restored them to default libraries.  It was so easy.  However, for days I have not known what to do, and I could not load my pictures for the blog.  So, like one of my grandsons says, I did it!  Yea! 

Finding a New Perspective

Sometimes you just need a little bit of alone time to clear your head and see things from a new perspective. 
                                         ~Katrina Mayer

Yesterday, a friend of mine sent this quote to me on Facebook.  The more I thought about it, the more I know , that I have to take a break.  I'm tired, I'm sick, and I need to spend time away from the computer.  Also, my house is beginning to suffer the consequences of the last few weeks;  even though, it has been in worse shape than now.   

Yes, I have that problem too.  Actually, I think you already knew that.  I am not Mrs. Perfect Housekeeper:  I do the best I can.  And lately, my body has required more naps and I still feel too  fatigued.  Even my brain feels fatigued, and it is affecting me.

Jesus took time away from the crowds during His ministry.  If He needed that, how much more is that necessary for the rest of us.  Thus, taking note of that in my own life, I know am feeling drained.  So, if I miss someone's comment on Facebook or I don't post everyday, I haven't left.  I am taking a break, spending time with the Lord, working in my house, and resting.   Maybe, I will even go to the park.

Deborah needs to take care of Deborah, just like you all need to take care of yourselves.  And, if we don't take care of ourselves it is hard to minister to other people's needs.  Therefore, I declare an October break for at least a week, unless I am hit with a moment of inspiration that cannot be ignored.  

Take note of this in your own lives.  When you are feeling emptied out and fatigued to the core, it may be time to step back and reassess.  You may not even need to reassess:  you may need to play and nurture your inner child.   The point is we all need mini-vacations, even if it is just for a day.  That doesn't mean you have to go out of town.   But, you may need a shift from the norm, especially if you feel you are in a rut.  Even that can be done at home.  

Maybe, you need to pamper yourself a little:  do your nails, get your hair trimmed, and shave your legs.  Men, you don't have to shave your legs or do your nails, other than trimming them.  Maybe, you need to go on a picnic, go golfing, go fishing, or take a walk in the park.  

Have you been procrastinating on doing some things that would renew your spirit:  painting a picture, playing the piano, or writing a poem?  Do you need a mini-retreat with your Bible and a journal to spend unhurried time with God?

What do you need?  What would minister to your mind, your body, and your spirit?  Even an hour away is better than none.

My prayer is that you find time to rest and renew.  We get so busy, that it is sometimes hard to slow our minds down;  then, all of a sudden, we realize we have run out of inspiration.  Or, we may have it, but we are too tired to actually implement it.

That's where I am.  So, I know you will understand as I take a break.  I may even make the doctor's appointment I put off.  The one I had for October was cancelled by my doctor's office, and I never seem to call them at the right time.   

Remember -- you need to care for yourself in order to be able to care for others.  When you have a chronic illness, you cannot continually run on empty, because you will suffer the consequences.  We will feel like better husbands, wives, grandmothers, mothers, fathers, grandfathers, and friends when we care for ourselves.  It's a matter of pacing ourselves, and we sometimes need longer blocks of time to renew. 

Sometimes, we may feel a little like we are on a runaway train;  that, it is impossible to get off.  Hey!  It's not impossible.  We can get off.  We just have to do it.

I am doing it.

I plan to see you in about a week.

Love, Deborah

The Master Bedroom, The Start and End To Your Day

Image Courtesy of  [luigi diamanti] / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Last week, I finished writing about the heart of the home.  However, would you be surprised that some people consider the master bedroom the heart of their home?  After all, it is a place where we should be able to retreat when we need some peace and quiet;  moreover, this is where we rest our heads at night, so our bodies can repair and be ready for the morrow.  Even though, many people with chronic illnesses do not get optimal rest at night, we still need to have a place where we can get the best possible rest for our bodies.  

A neat, well-tended bedroom is a blessing.  Have you ever walked into a bed and breakfast, a hotel room, or a comfortable guest room, and felt the almost instantaneous relaxing of your body?  Ah, what a pleasant place, my place to let down my hair, to put up my feet, and to find comfort and relaxation.  Compare this to walking in a room that has clothes tossed over various chairs, clothes baskets waiting to be emptied, boxes tossed in a corner to be out of the way, shoes lying in various places where they were taken off, weeks of dust on the furniture, and an unmade bed.  I can say this, because I have been there.  How about you?  Does any of this sound familiar?  

Image Courtesy of [winnond]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A bedroom does not have to be sumptuous to be delightful.  I have admired bedrooms that had stacked crates beside the bed for nightstands and unmatched tables for setting down items one needs.   The creativity of making a bedroom a comfortable place does not depend on a fat pocketbook.  However, there are some basics that make a difference in how a person feels when walking into his or her own room.  Here is a list of what I consider basic:  

1. A chair with arms, so you can assist yourself in standing up.
2. A dresser or chest of drawers for your clothes.  Even crates or inexpensive rolling carts will work.  If you want to dress them up, you could paint them or throw a scarf of some sort over the top.
3. Tables beside the bed;  however, I have seen lovely design settings where stacked books were used.
4. Lamps beside the beds and possibly a small book light for those that have spouses who are annoyed by light when he/she is trying to sleep.
5. Closets are nice, but people used hooks and wardrobes long before there were closets.  Also, shoes can be neatly lined up under the side of the bed.  Some people even buy rolling carts.  I have a hanging shoe bag in my closet.

These are some of the essentials.  If you think of some more, please write a comment.  And I might add:  if you have CFS/ME or Fibromyalgia, you should consider a comfortable bed.  This is where I would put my money.  If you cannot afford a new mattress, at least top it with some sort of padding to cushion your body in the right places.  

Image Courtesy of [Maggie Smith]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Moreover, let me talk about sheets.  I am sure we all have our preferences.  Sometime in the middle of my bouts with Fibromyalgia, I discovered that thread counts do count.  It seems the sheets with a thread count of 600 or higher feel better when they touch my skin.  It is pitiful when even the sheets hurt your skin;  however, they have:  and, I felt desperate.  I could not stand to be touched for a time.  Just the brush of my husband's elbow against me at night made me stay awake for hours.  I hurt everywhere.  That is when we got a king size bed and I got a higher thread count in our sheets.  Let me add:  it was not my husband's fault:  it was the miserable illness.  How, anyone does not believe a person with Fibromyalgia is sick, is beyond me.  Thank goodness there is data now to back up what we feel in our bodies.

So there it is:  my introduction to a week of cleaning the master bedroom.  My goal is to walk in, to see and smell the freshness, and be rid of most of the dust mites in my room.  How many of you wake up with stuffy, swollen sinuses or with post-nasal drip?  I want my bedroom to be a launching point for my day, my own personal bed and breakfast room, and a place that oozes restfulness and peace to me and my husband.  

Finally, it doesn't matter whether you have children at home or you are the only one that lives there --your bedroom can help set the tone for your day.  I know it is your attitude that should set the tone for the day, but having a clean, neat room can make a difference.  I think order in our lives is an innate need, even a God-given need.  Therefore, I am looking forward to this week of working on our bedrooms.  Maybe, some of you will be able to do the advanced version.  LOL.  However, some of us have some heavy dusting to do.

Gentle hugs,
Deborah

P.S.  Later on tonight, I will post the proposed cleaning schedule for our bedrooms.  I know there will probably be differences, depending on the state of your room;  so, please don't be frustrated if my suggestions do not exactly fit your situation.  If you have any questions, you can comment here or at Chronic Fatigue and Creative Decluttering.

When Up Is Down, and Down Is Up

When one has Fibromyalgia and CFS/ME, we sometimes have those days that not only do our brains work slower, we feel out and out foggy.  This afternoon, I am sitting here with my ears ringing about as loudly as the television;  and I am wondering what will happen if I go out to the kitchen to do some work in there.  Will I have to stop, because I only have enough energy to wash one or two bowls?  My inclination is to stay in my recliner covered up with blankets.  It's not that cold today, but I'm cold;  and, it feels cozy where I am right now.  I think that is probably as good as it is going to get today.

Did I mention my fingers are numb and tingly too?

Do you ever have days like this, and do you wonder where they come from?  Do you wonder about symptoms that come and go, or symptoms that are magnified sometimes, but not every day?  For instance, my ears do not usually ring this loudly:  right now, I can only describe the sound as very, very loud crickets or ocean without the break between waves.  When I have no other sound in a room, I sometimes hear a light cricket sound;  however, now, the sound is blaring loudly.  

All these symptoms are also described by other fibromyalgia patients. Sometimes we wonder what makes our symptoms kick in.  Well, today, I have an inkling I know what is making my day slow and weird.  I woke up early this morning,  and I had such bad excess acid, that I could not keep it down.  The pain made me feel like I was going to pass out, and I went into a cold sweat.  I had to lie down just in case.  If I hadn't known that I ate something that could give me excess acid before I went to bed, I would have been more concerned.  You see, I am no stranger to passing out:  I have done it ever since I was 11 or 12 years old.  However, it does give me pause, so I will go to my doctor.  

Ladies, have you ever thought you wouldn't know if you were having a heart attack, because of the fibromyalgia.  I've had stress tests twice, because I got esophageal spasms.  I don't get them very often, but the first one made me think I was having a heart attack. The spasm was so painful, I passed out.    Today, I haven't had an esophageal spasm but my chest wall is one big burning ache.  Right now, my sternum is sore without even touching it, so I have an ice pack on it.  

The reason I am going over all these symptoms is because they are fresh in my mind, not because I want sympathy.  

Dear Ones, I know how frustrating it can be.  Sometimes, weird is the only thing we can think to describe the way we feel. It feels a little bit like being Alice in Wonderland:  you don't know whether up is down, or down is up.  



   I hope you all are having a good day.

created by me for you

Light hugs to you,

Deborah

For more information on Fibromyalgia Symptoms, click here:  The Monster List of Fibromyalgia Symptoms  by Adrienne Dellwo.

Weekend - Monday Potpourri

So how are things going with you?  Well, I hope.  Are you pacing yourself and resting without guilt?  That is important, because the guilt negates the resting--it leaves the body in a chemically ready to go state, at least that is what I think.  When you rest, you need to turn the mind off from the I need to do this and this needs to happen state.  It's a matter of self-preservation.

I'm in semi-rest mode after a mega weekend.  Our sweet 17 year old kitty died, I sang a solo Sunday morning, made Christmas cookies, worked in the yard, and sang in our Christmas musical all in one weekend.  And we had a fellowship after church Sunday night.  That was absolutely Mega-Weekend for me.  And I am still feeling badly about our cat, but she was sick and it was her time to go.  I am so glad she didn't suffer a long time.  I had almost decided not to put up our big Christmas tree, but in honor of our sweet kitty, who loved to lie under the tree, it is going up tonight.  Last night, my husband and I rearranged the living room, which is not an easy job in our very oddly shaped room.

Please ignore the spastic looking hand.
A model, I am not.
What counts is we were having fun!

The other part of this potpourri of things going on is a revelation I had yesterday afternoon.  So many people tend to save their pretty clothes for "going out", including me.  But yesterday, I wore black leggings, which looked absolutely smashing with a long decorated sweatshirt;  however, I got hot because I was working.  So I put on makeup, pretty ear rings, and a "hot" tunic top.  When my husband got home, I surprised him--he wasn't expecting dressy looking Debby.  Moving furniture was so much fun last night:  I think I ended up more tired, because we were dancing to the Christmas music -- absolutely worth it.

How can I dance with a bum knee?  It is called I got a cortisone shot in my right knee last week and now it feels good.  Oh, why did I wait so long?  Two months of bad pain is over.

Lastly, here is an easy cookie recipe:  Press one 16.5 ounce chocolate chip cookie roll in a greased 9 X 13 pan.  Beat 3 eggs, 1 tsp. vanilla, and 9 oz. cream cheese together.  Pour over cookie dough.  Break another 16.5 oz. roll of cookie dough into small pieces and place on top of cream cheese mixture.  Bake at 350 degree f.  for 30 minutes.  After cooling, store in refrigerator.  Yummy.  And easy.

Handling the Truth about My Illness

Yesterday, I tried to write and all I could do was feel stuck in fog.  I even went to look up some information on what it feels like to have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, as if I didn't know.  I'll share a link with you at the end of this blog post, but first I want to write while my brain feels clear.

"Autumn Colors"[by dan] / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

How do I let you know I am being positive, even when I write about the realities of this disease?  I know that it is not officially a disease, because the researchers have not pinpointed the cause of the syndrome:  but, those of us who have it know it feels like a disease. And just because someone doesn't know what causes it, does not mean it isn't a disease.   That sounds sad, but it isn't depressing to me like it used to be.  The depression many have with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome used to be unbearable.  For months on end, I think I did little but exist;  but, that has changed.  

However, that does not mean that I don't have to deal with the moodiness or feeling that I am coming down with something.  It does not mean I don't get tired of CFS and FM, or that for a while I might hope I will never feel this way again.  I know what is causing the mild depression; I try to do what I can every day; and  I know I did not ask to be this way.  Whether other people understand or not is something I cannot help.  Sometimes, I don't even understand.  I went to therapy before I knew I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, and that helped me with worrying about what other people thought.  I knew I had Fibromyalgia, NASH, and prediabetes.  What I didn't know was I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome too, until about a year later.  I also have a strange skin condition called Erythema Annulare Centrifugum, which I have had since my late twenties.  I have had it for over 30 years and it varies in the places it appears, and in severity.  I had it all summer, and it was bearable.  Right now, I have one area that is quite deep -- and it burns, hurts, and itches.  But guess what!  I am not depressed like I used to be, because I know  that I deal with something I did not cause.  I know all this fits together somehow.  Furthermore, I know that God knows my heart, even when I doubt myself.  He knows me better than I do.  When I read Psalm 139, I am completely assured that God knows everything about me;  and my heart is calmed.  

Finally, I suppose some of you might wonder what this has to do with FlyLady's 31 Beginner Babysteps.  It is a matter of facing reality.  This summer I began to feel better and I was able to do more, including light exercise.  Some days, I felt as if I was getting better and would probably be able to maintain at a certain level.  Unfortunately, I could not do that.  As I added things into my life, I was sapped of more energy, and I did not recover well.  Then, I began to feel guilty and angry (usually at myself), that I could not live a normal life.  The fact is I have a new normal, or perhaps a better way to say this is I have a different normal.  And I know this is true for many of my readers.

Therefore, I will be mentioning FlyLady's 31 Beginner Babysteps in passing.  I am still going to work on my habits,  but at a pace I can maintain.  I cannot and will not please everyone.  It is impossible.  But I can pray, ask for guidance, and be happy in my circumstances.  If I try to do more than my body can handle to please other people, than I am not being honest.  I know there are times I put out more, because I am shooting for normal, whatever that is.  However, my body shuts down;  and it has done that to me for the last 20 years.  About three years ago, I  became so ill I felt like I had the flu all the time and I did not recover for even a few weeks.  I was desperate to find  a way to get well.  I knew it was not just FM and liver disease.  The point is:  I'm the one that has to live with it, as does my husband to a degree.  What anyone else thinks about me is irrelevant:  I cannot help it if people, who do not share my circumstances, do not understand.

Whatever chronic / invisible illness you have -- you are the one, who knows how it makes you feel physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.  Nobody else can determine that for you;  however, there are counselors that can help.  And if you know God, He will help you too, whether that means complete healing or coming to terms with living on this earth with a disability.  

That is enough for today -- somehow, I don't feel like this is a finished subject.  I'm going to get a snack, put some laundry in the dryer, and rest.  Maybe, I will look at FlyLady's 31 Beginner Babysteps for encouragement.   However, I want you to remember that doing the Babysteps is an experiment for me.  I am not going to feel guilty when I cannot do them, nor do I want you to feel guilty.  Resting is doing something.

The following link is an informative one on post-exertional malaise and how it feels:  Unraveling Post-exertional Malaise by Jennifer M. Spotila, J.D.

No Guilt Flare-up

Feeling the Pressure
D. Bolton

Have you ever read a book, watched TV, surfed the internet, or just sat feeling horrible;  instead, of reading your Bible, praying or listening to Christian music?  Have you ever wondered if God would show you a verse to make you stop feeling guilty for being sick?  Well, I have and I know better;  but sometimes, I think I will never stop having relapses and then I worry about those people who don't understand, even though, I know the scriptures that tell me not to worry.  

You and I cannot do a thing about what other people think.  We really don't know what they think if they do not tell us.  And to make a guess about what they are thinking is pure supposition.  Here are some of the things I am physically experiencing now:  trouble falling asleep, trouble staying asleep, and awful dreams.  And of course, I am having pain and balance problems.  Right now, my tinnitus seems more pronounced, and I am exhausted.  My body felt like it had nervous system buzz going though it all day.  Right now, I am finding it a difficult to type, but as a last resort, I took some medicine to help me relax.  Feeling my nerves throughout my body is so uncomfortable:   I  would categorize it as painful.  And of course, I am feeling the fibromyalgia pain, as well as experiencing debilitating fatigue.  

Therefore, I have lost another day towards completing my 31 day challenge.  But that is not going to ruin the work towards reaching my goal.  When I am able I will continue FlyLady's 31 Beginner Babysteps.  

That is what pacing yourself is about.  You have to be gentle with yourself, and listen to your body.  Sometimes, your body will shout to you to rest all day.  Other times, you will be able to pace activities throughout the day.  Rest is not failure.  Rest is necessary.  Be gentle and let yourself heal as best you can.

Self-Motivation - Toolkit for Success

The thing we are working on now is self-motivation.  I can practically hear some of the groans, because I have been in the place where I thought I would never be motivated again, which made me feel guilty and more depressed.  Having an illness that clings like a vine on a brick wall that you can't get rid of is disheartening, a miserable state of existence;  until, a change is affected in one's heart.   I had to learn to quit looking back at what was, and learn to live in my present.  That actually helped with the self-motivation. 

Very simply, I am going to list the things we should be doing now.  We should be visualizing each step of the habit we are going to change.  My habit is to sit at the computer less.  I am visualizing myself writing my blog, the timer goes off after **30 minutes:  I may make that a little longer.  This is a work in progress.  I get up:  go to the bathroom, get some more water to drink, fix myself a snack, do about 15 to 30 minutes of housework, or whatever needs doing.  The main idea is to move around and free my mind from writing for a few minutes.  Now, I need to take a break.  I'm getting a cup of decaffeinated coffee and 2 lemon snaps (my dessert);  and, I am going to watch a television program, something light and funny.

Most habits being changed should be for a shorter duration than I plan, such as