Putting Away Things in Present Time

This looks like a child's room, but it might be the catch all room.
The point is that most people who deal with clutter have had a
room that was a frustration and a mess.  Did you know
there was a study done on how having
too many toys in an area is frustrating for  children?
This makes them feel overwhelmed and depressed.  If
this bothers children, what do you think it does to grownups,
especially an adult that is dealing with chronic illness.  Yep!
It is overwhelming for her too.  
Image courtesy of Bill Longshaw - FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Are you putting up things in your house as you go along?  For the past month, I have been making a concentrated effort to do this as I clean up my messes.

I tend to be a piler:  here a stack, there a stack.  Sometimes, it isn't even stacked.  Sometimes, my stuff is strewn.  For instance, I had a hamper full of things I needed to go through.  I have some of those hampers that can be squished flat for storage, and they work well for cleaning up clutter:  put up, throw away, and give away.  I have also used one for a quick clean up, when I ran out of time.

Image courtesy of sattva - FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The truth is that I hate going through stuff I have thrown into a hamper or box for a quick clean up.  Sure, it seems efficient when you are in a bind, but getting to it later is hard.  You have to very disciplined in that area or learn to do the first time.

Do it the first time.  What do I mean by do it the first time?  If you get it out, put it up when you are done.  If you come home and you have brought in a couple of bags of things from the store, hang them up and put them in the cupboards.  If you bring in a newspaper, read it and recycle it.  If you have mail, go through it when you bring it in.

Even when your house is a cluttered challenge to be worked on, you can learn to put up things the first time.  This means you will not pile mess on top of mess.  This is one of the ways we become more unorganized and lose things.  Believe me I know.  When you pile stuff on a table or chair, you forget where you put things, because you cover them up.  I am not fussing at you, because I am guilty of this as anyone.

When I visit someone, I always do better in the areas I am talking about.  Do you notice this is the case for you?  Is it because we are more relaxed in our own homes;  or, maybe it is because we get caught up in other things as we come in the house or we are working on a project.  We are interrupted by other family members, our own immediate needs, the phone ringing, or time schedules.

Image courtesy of photostock - FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Maybe, you think it is impossible to change.  I simply refuse to believe that. Habits can be changed with baby steps.  Take small steps in the right direction everyday.  If you have a glitch or backslide in an area, work it again.  Actually, working this way can be quite methodical and organized.

Are you living in a mess now?  Spend a little time every day working on one area.  While you work on your messy areas, put things up as you go along in your daily life.  This is so much easier than letting things pile up in little stacks all over the house.  Also, I cannot emphasize enough the need to get rid of the things that are not useful and beautiful in your lives.  If you make the effort to get rid of the clutter, it actually gets easier.  Try it, you might like it.

Hugs, Deborah

Adjust During Chores

Getting Back Into Your Routines

Image Courtesy of [imagerymajestic]
/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Getting back into our routines is hard after Christmas and New Years.  I wonder if you do what I sometimes do.  Do you start thinking about the things you said you were going to do in the new year, but you haven't finished them or even gotten started?  Do you plan to clean the house, so it doesn't lose the spit and polish it had during the holiday season?  If this happens, don't feel like you are all by yourself;  and, prepare yourself to jump right in where you are.  

Don't worry if you have been feeling off.  You can clean your house, baby step by baby step.  If you feel depressed, it will help your depression every time you accomplish one of those steps -- at least, it seems to do that for most people.  Here is a quote from my April 21, 2013 post, Perfectionism, Procrastination, Or Both?

Image Courtesy of [David Castillo Dominici]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I know the chronic illness is often the thing that gets in the way.  When we are in pain and unrelenting fatigue assails our bodies, our routines often fly out the window.  We wonder how to get started up again, as we compare what we used to do with what we get done now.  I understand.

The best example I can think of ... comes from my own personal life... I started getting rid of the clutter in my dining room, which is also my  workroom, and the most used entry into our house.  I had a goal, which included having the table and sideboard decorated for Easter.  However, as I worked, I realized I needed to organize my arts and crafts supplies or box everything;  also, I was working on a couple of blog posts... I had other things that had to be done too:  laundry, bathrooms that needed to be cleaned, blogs and Facebook pages to tend to.

 "What's the point?",  you may ask.  The point is not finishing the dining room did not kept me from working on it a little bit at a time.  I have done the necessary everyday things, which I can rarely finish in one day... I jump in where I am.  I try to do a little bit everyday.  On the days I feel better, I may do a little more.

An example would be the bathrooms I cleaned on Saturday.  I cleaned the sinks and counters in both bathrooms, and in one I wiped down the toilet.  I had done the inside and outside of the half bath toilet two nights before, so I concentrated on the things that needed cleaning the most.  I didn't do the shower in the big bathroom, because  it was too big a job for me to tend to that day.  Nor did I do the inside of the toilet bowl in the master bath, because I was plumb out of energy...  

The point is I have not let perfectionism keep me from cleaning my bathrooms.  It is not an all or nothing thing.  My house is cleaner than it was a month ago.  In fact, I was able to rest comfortably when I needed to, because I had cleaned the toilet bowl  less than a week ago.   I feel good about what I'm doing, because I am making progress.  Truthfully, I doubt my house will ever be as clean as I used to keep it when I was healthy.   But, that does not mean I have to give up.  Nor do I have to compare myself with people that are physically able to do more.  I am doing what I can do, baby step by baby step.

Image Courtesy of [Grant Cochrane]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Are you with me?  Are you ready to work on those bathrooms this week?
If you have enough energy, you can do this in more than one bathroom;  but, I recommend choosing the bathroom that you think needs the most attention.

Tuesday:  Pick up the things that do not belong on the bathroom floor:  dirty towels, discarded clothes, shoes, and toys.  Put those towels in the washing machine if you have a load.  

Wednesday:  Clean off that counter and the back of the toilet.  Put away the things that do not belong there.  Throw away any trash you see in the bathroom.

Thursday:  Assemble your tools for wiping off your bathroom counters and the bathroom sink.  Wipe it down.  Dry it off.  Doesn't it look nice?  Hint:  Keep your cleaning tools in a carrying container like a bucket or under your sink.  If you have small children, be sure to childproof your cabinets.

Image Courtesy of [twobee]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Friday:  Soak and Scrub the toilet with your toilet brush.  With a rag or paper towel, wipe off the back, the tank, the cover and seat, and underneath the seat.  If you have little boys, you may need to wipe all the way down to the floor, otherwise use your discretion.  I am still looking for a long handled tool to do this, because it is quite painful for me to bend and get in the spaces I use to clean.  Sometimes, I clean the bottom of the toilet with my mop, while doing my mopping. 

Saturday or Monday:  My shower could use a wipe down.  How about yours?

Tuesday:  Are you sick of working on the bathroom?  Here is an optional task:  Mop, depending on how long it has been since you mopped the bathroom floor or whether it needs it. 

Hint: If you take a handi-wipe and wipe off that sink, counter-top, and toilet now and everyday -- your job will be easier every time. 

This is a way of spreading out your work in an area and making it easier.  I like to set a timer for 15 minutes;  however, if I am too fatigued, I set the timer for 5 or 10 minutes.  

We can do this together!

Hugs, 

Deborah

P.S.  One day, I am going to put wiping down the cabinets on that list.  

Clean Is Possible

Seeing this picture of my dusted, neatly displayed books, and other items is a lift to the hope in my heart, that I can get to the point of being able to easily keep my house clean and uncluttered.  The bookcases were the last things I cleaned in the living room.  I usually give them a quick once-over, but this time I took the two days to do the job right.  

Sore knees, as well as tired and achy body, slow me down;  however, they don't have to keep me down.  Nor, do similar conditions have to keep you from doing things you would like to get done.  

Sometimes, persevering and sticking to it seems easier said than done;  but, you can do your chores in baby steps.  It's a matter of dedication.  

Some people learn to pace themselves and get the house in a reasonably clean condition faster than others.  Learning the how-to's is often dependent on a number of circumstances, so don't have a guilt trip over how long it takes you to develop a routine you can manage.  It has literally taken me years to develop my habits to a point I do not have to stuff things in a closet or take them out to the garage to have a house that looks clean.  I still consider myself and my habits as works in progress.

What are some of the negative circumstances that often keep people who have chronic illnesses and chronic conditions from keeping their homes uncluttered and clean?  

• Stress
• Fatigue
• Relapses
• Flares
• Depression
• Guilt
• Anxiety
• Surgery
• Pain
• Afraid pain will develop from being more active
• Lack of help or/and understanding in your home
• Permanent Disability
• Financial Conditions
• Have developed bad habits while ill
• Have grown physically weak from being sedentary

Two months ago, I did a detailed cleaning of the master bedroom.  My bedroom is still clean!  I am more conscious of hanging clothes up and putting my belongings away.  Dusting the bedroom is easier.  My next detailed cleaning of the master bedroom should be simpler.  I don't want it to take five days to get the job done, nor do I want to breathe in dust every night, as I sleep.  

It is lovely to know this is working.  I am feeling more confident that I can keep my home cleaned and uncluttered, despite my illnesses and my flare-ups.  

The truth is there have been bumps in the road for me.  I have gotten rooms clean before, and I've had them go back to messy.  However, the more I work at this, the better it gets.  In my gut, I have known there was a way to take care of my house better, even while ill.  Now, I am being assured by the results I am experiencing.

What can you achieve as you build better habits?  Can you let go of obsessions?  The following list may be some things that have bothered you:  obsessions over what you keep in your house; obsessing that the house has to be cleaned or decluttered in one day or one week; obsessions that only the way you clean is right;   and the obsession that if the house is not perfect, than it is not clean.  

Baby steps will get you there.  

We can do this.  We can improve our habits.  We can get the clutter out of our houses.  

Together,    We    Can   Do   This.  

You and I are thinking about decluttering:  getting it out of the house, and cleaning our homes, because we want it.  We want to enjoy the serenity of living in a clean, tidy environment.

I am praying for you, and I am cheering you on.

Love, 

Deborah

Do Men View Housecleaning Like Women Do?

Image Courtesy  of  [John Kasawa]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 Do you think men generally view housecleaning the same way as women? Please don't get angry with me, Men, for my answer, because from what I have seen, they don't.  It may be because they were brought up in a home where that was their mother's domain or it may be a "man thing."

The reason I bring this up is because of the things I notice and my husband doesn't seem to notice.   For instance, I think the kitchen is clean when the counters are wiped off and the dishes are put away.  If the sink is looking scummy, the kitchen is not really clean.  

He thinks the kitchen is clean when the dishes are put away and the counter is wiped off.  I am not sure he even notices the sink.

And then, there is vacuuming and mopping the floor.  Those are things I used to do weekly without fail, sometimes more often if necessary.  However, I haven't done either of those things for a while, and I don't think it bothers my husband.  It just doesn't cross his mind, unless company is coming.  However, if I ask him he will do the vacuuming, and every once in a while he just gets inspired.  

Image Courtesy of [artur 84]/
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

This week, I desperately need to vacuum.  I know I will hurt afterwards, but I was just cleaning up a spot on the floor and the amount of dog hair that came up convinced me.  Truthfully, I am not all that crazy about carpet anymore.  I think hardwood floors would be easier to take care of, but we live in our church's house.  And they don't plan to spend any more money on it, because eventually, they are going to knock it down.  Although, I still think it would be great for missionaries on furlough.

The neat thing is that I can try out the inexpensive decorating eyes ideas I see on Pinterest -- after I clean.

So, I guess you may have an inkling what the challenge for this week is -- if you can handle it.  I am going to suggest vacuuming at least one room a day. This time, don't worry about getting the baseboards.  Those are good to do when the focus of the week is one room.

I still have picking up to do.  It seems like a never ending cycle.  However, I did make headway last week.  Also, I need to dust the living room.  I never finished that.  So, I suppose my focus room this week is the living room. What is your focus room for the week?

Why Make a Day List During a Flare or Relapse?

Are you having a flare or a relapse?  Many people call any extra ache or pain a flare, whether it lasts two days or two months.  However, I think it is more reliable to think of a flare as a symptoms that have gotten stronger or come back for a shorter amount of time -- probably for a twenty-four hours or less. To me a relapse has the connotation of a return of symptoms that are stronger and last longer than a week.

Do you  ever have a problem with deciding on the appropriate designation for your symptoms?  I wouldn't worry about it.  Either way you feel worse ;  and, there is a negative impact during these times.

You could take time to pamper a little.
Do you need a bath or shower?

However, if you can get past the pain and doldrums, as well as the sickly, icky feelings that come with flares and relapses to take action in your home situation, you might feel better mentally and emotionally.  Knowing you have done at least one thing on your daily schedule,  can help most people improve confidence and  satisfaction during the day.  The problem is getting yourself moving, and being careful not to do too much.  Pacing yourself is an imperative, which means rest.  Don't push yourself too hard or you may end up feeling worse.


Should you work during a flare or a relapse?  That is a question each of you have to answer;  and the answer probably depends on how serious your relapse is.  Have most of your symptoms returned?  Are you fighting off an infection or a virus?  What are the circumstances of your life?  Are you more stressed than usual?  All of these things need to be taken into account. 
 

The List

You have seen a possible weekly cleaning schedule, which can enhance developing a routine while ridding your house of clutter.  However, have you thought much about a daily list that has definite goals written down?  

Brain fog is a debilitating factor of Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.  Some people feel like they have fogginess every day, even on more normal days.  

One way to combat brain fog is a designated list for the day, written on scrap paper or in an inexpensive notebook. 























During my relapses, I would accomplish very little, relying only on my weekly schedule.  I need to see specific tasks written down, so I can cross them off.  When I see a task crossed off my list, it boosts my morale.  I may still feel worse than usual, but I am not as bored, nor do I feel like I've completely lost a day.  

Even if you only accomplish very small tasks, it is a good thing.  Working helps dissipate depression;  moreover, it means you will not have as much to catch up on when you are able to do more.

One hint about your designated list for the day:  even on good days, do not make it too long.  Don't write down more than three things on it.  In fact, if you are having a flare or a relapse, more than three things will probably be too much.  The principle of three works.  If you have more energy after getting three things done, you can always add another thing you want to do.

I hope this helps you on your more difficult days.  I can't guarantee that you will always feel better if you do something; but, after a flare or relapse, it is harder to get moving if all you have done is sit all day.  

During a relapse or flare, I have found that when I am able to do at least one active thing every day, my morale is higher than if I sit all day.

Therefore, try to keep moving on your flare days;  but also, remember to rest when you feel like you are shaky, dizzy, or over-fatigued.    

God bless you all.  Have a good week!

Deborah

One Easy Rule

Never leave a room empty-handed.  That means every time you leave a room you can take at least one thing with you that needs to be relocated.  Are you actually going up the stairs this very moment? No?  However, you can leave one or two items at the bottom of the stairs, awaiting your trip up there.

The above method can be applied to any room, and it adds up to a cleaner house.  I don't always do this, but I think it's about time I did.  How about you?  Is this something that will make your life a little easier?

Join us for the rest of October in 

The Never Leave A Room Empty Handed Challenge  The Never Leave a Room Empty Handed Challenge
The Never Leave A Room Empty Handed Challenge
    The Never Leave A Room Empty Handed Challenge   The Never Leave A Room Empty Handed Challenge  the never leave a room empty handed challenge 

Cleaning the Master Bedroom: Part 2

In part 2 of Cleaning the Master Bedroom, you will have two lists, one for those of you that need a basic list and a second list that is for a deeper cleaning.

Don't panic.  You only need to work from one of these lists, and these are suggestions. They are not laws or rules.  The cleaning lists are meant to be a guide, so relax and work at your own pace.  This is not a race, nor it is a time to push yourself beyond what your body is able to handle.  I have inserted hints along the way.  Before jumping in, read the hints.  They are important.

Number 1 Hint:  A timer is a great tool to use for cleaning.  If you have been very sedentary or you are coming back from a flare or relapse, you may need to work in short spurts, then rest.  I suggest setting your timer for five to fifteen minutes for each job;  however, when recovering from a flare, I have worked in short spurts of one minute to 3 minutes.  You know your body better than anyone else.  Sit down when you need to.  Moreover, do not forget to stay hydrated.

Hint:  Nearby, have boxes, baskets or hampers marked throw away, give away, put away.   

Simple List:  Cleaning 101

• Day 1  Pick up any clothes lying on the furniture or floors, that includes shoes. Put clean clothes away, put dirty clothes in the clothes basket or washing machine, and put your shoes where they belong.
• Day 2  Clean trash off the dressers and bedside tables.  Use your marked hampers, baskets, or boxes.  Then, take care of the items in them.   
• Day 3  Now, you can dust.  If it has been a while you may need more than one cloth or Swiffer Duster refill.  Microfiber dusters and cloths work well too, because they are washable, as well as holding a good amount of dust.  A vacuum cleaning wand or an ostrich feather duster works well on lampshades.  
• Day 4  If you did not wash your sheets after raising all that dust, it is time to change your sheets.  Get some help shaking out your bedspread if you are not going to wash it.   And of course, make the bed.
• Day 5  Vacuum and enjoy your clean, beautiful room.

Hint:  If you tend to be obsessive or a perfectionist, let it go.  You will only exhaust yourself, and most likely you will end up procrastinating.  Set your timer, and know your house is going to look better.  It doesn't have to be perfect. 

Deep Cleaning List (For bedrooms that are reasonably neat, because you       have been hanging up your clothes and you usually put away your shoes. )                      

• Day 1  Pick up any clothes lying on the furniture or floors, that includes shoes. Put clean clothes away, put dirty clothes in the clothes basket or washing machine, and put your shoes where they belong.  Walk starting at the door, and go to each area of your room.  Remove items that do not belong on your dressers and bedside tables.  Rest.  Dust.
• Day 2  Use the long handled cleaning wand on your vacuum cleaner and vacuum around the baseboards.  Rest.  If you have enough energy, vacuum the center of the room too.  (If there is someone in your house who will help you, ask for assistance vacuuming under the bed. Otherwise, do this another day.)
• Day 3  If you like your furniture to be polished and you can tolerate the scent, you might want to polish your furniture.  This an optional item, but sometimes I like to do this because it helps clean off rings or anything that is missed with a duster.  Rest.  
• Day 4  Wash and Change your sheets.  If you feel well, check your mirror an window for finger prints or doggy nose prints.   
• Day 5  This might be the time to put up a new picture or change around your pillows, or maybe you should just enjoy a cup of tea in your beautiful bedroom.  A nap might be nice too.  Follow your heart and pace yourself.     

Hint:  We are trying to make our houses reasonably clean.  This should be a            process you enjoy, especially the results.  Perfection is not an option              here.  You need to care for your body, otherwise, you may have a flare            that keeps you from doing what you care about.

A Final Word

When we deal with illness that causes chronic fatigue, it is important to be patient with yourself.  Sometimes, a one week plan becomes a two, three, or four week plan.  The important thing to remember is everything you clean or declutter, no matter how small it seems, adds up.  Eventually, you will see a difference in your house.  

Moreover, you learn that even if you have a setback, you can take baby steps back to reasonably clean.  I have had to do this many times.  I would be nice to be able to say that my home is always clean and I am always neat. However, that is not the case.  When I have a relapse, I don't get much done. Things tend to pile beside my recliner.  However, I have seen an overall improvement in my attitude.  Instead of feeling frozen and being disgusted with myself, I know I can take those five minute baby steps back to reasonably clean.  

Finally, if you have not already developed the habit of cleaning up behind yourself, you will probably become more conscious of putting items away immediately.  And remember the old adage, "If you get it out, you  have to put it away."

I hope you have a fruitful week.  May you have a week filled with blessings.

Deborah

Using The Principle of Three

The Principle of Three is one way I have of listing particular things I need to get done in a day.  If you don't have a regular list of things you do on certain days, this is very helpful.  You can break one job into three timed sessions or do three different things.  Nobody knows what needs to be done at your house better than you.

Moreover, I have noticed that some days just don't work out the way I plan.  Having a Weekly Cleaning List is nice, but being flexible is a must.  This week I need to be flexible, because I have been dragging the last couple of days.

On the Chronic Fatigue and Decluttering Facebook page,  I am going to list three things on which I am working:  I am asking you to do the same.  This Principle of Three List is for Friday through Monday.  If you have done your three, we would love to congratulate you.  If you were able to do part of your list but could not finish, we still want to hear from you.  Also, I want you to remember there is No Judging here.  I like to aim for 5 to 15 minutes working on each thing;  however, some people are not strong enough for that.  I wasn't when I started.  If you are trying to gain back strength, your three might be to spend one minute three times working on one job; or it could be putting away three items.

Don't forget to rest in between.  Also, you need to hydrate:  drink your water.  And, don't forget to rest!

Cleaning Calendar

Copyright 2013 by Deborah Bolton
I can do all things through Christ which [strengthens] me.
                                                          Philippians 4:13 (KJV

DAILY
Morning/Afternoon

Make bed

Take meds and supplements

Wipe counters/sinks               

Empty dishwasher                  

One load of laundry
Work on zone (for 15 minutes or less)

Chore of the day
Night

Load dishwasher

Wipe kitchen counters
Pickup using baskets

   Adapted from  M. Cilley's

      Flying Lesson: Zones 

                Weekly 

                                       MONDAY:  Vacuum Centers and dust

                                       TUESDAY:  Clean Toilets

                                       WEDNESDAY:  Mid-week planning,

                                                             Anti-procrastination Day 

                                       THURSDAY:  Mop floors

                                        FRIDAY:  Catch-up Day

                                        SATURDAY:  Family Day

Copyright 2013 by Deborah Bolton

It is my pleasure to share this with you, my readers and fellow travelers in the chronic illness zone  and for those who are reasonably healthy, but find this approach to cleaning an easier one.  I am going to print this out and frame it to see if it works for me.

Experimenting again,

Deborah Bolton

                            

Here I Go Again! My Nest Needs Some Work.

Hello Everyone!  I hope you have been having a good weekend.  Mine has been a quiet one, because last week I got pretty worn out, which I should have figured would be the case.  However, I was overtired and rebelling against the fact that is usually what happens to me when I am out of my little nest.  I went through that blaming it on other things, when the fact I was not handling things well, because of the fatigue.  So I have rested.  

But now, I have to deal with the fact I let things go this week and still haven't unpacked.  What is my plan?  Baby steps are the way to go.  I plan to work on one room at a time, and I will rest when needed.  Each day, I am going to post what I plan to do for the next day.  You are welcome to follow along.  However, I realize your home may need to be worked on in different areas, or maybe you have another agenda this week.  

Moreover, realistically, I may not get everything done this week.  That is the way it is with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia, and other chronic illnesses.  The point is:  I am not ready to throw in the towel and give up.  One, two, three -- I will work on the principle of threes, and I know the house is going to look better by the end of the week.  Who knows?  I may even take pictures.  

It's Not Pretty

This morning, I got up to this.  Oh my!  It is not appealing to see this at all.  However, it did not just happen. It is an accumulation borne out of pre-vacation studying and after vacation dumping.  

Before vacation, I put all my energy into the absolute necessary, basics and getting things ready to go.  Normally, taking care of the clutter would be a basic, but I had to choose and I knew it would not go away.  Obviously, since it is still here today and growing.

My job today is to work on the pile, to take care of one  hot spot at a time.  Each hot spot is getting 5 minutes.  Some of this will go back to the bookcase.  There is some mail there too.  Maybe, some of that will go in the trash.  Just to be clear:  this table is one of my hot spots.  It is a place that becomes a magnet for my clutter. 

OK.  I have the basics of my cleaning for today planned.  Now, I will get something to eat. 

In With the Positive, Out With the Negative

Image Courtesy of [graur razvan ionut ]/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Routines are great.  That is one of the things that FlyLady encourages people to have;  however, chronic fatigue and illness often seems to to be the antithesis to daily rituals. When you want to forge on ahead, life seems to be an endless cycle of malaise, rest, and pushing ourselves harder than you should.  Chronic fatigue and pain from Fibromyalgia, Arthritis, and autoimmune illnesses slow you down.

One of my husband's favorite sayings is "Don't over-do."  He has seen what happens to me when I try to do too much.  The fact of the matter is I am unable to keep up the schedule I did in the past.  It took me too many years to admit that, partly because I did not understand how to work within the parameters of my illness.  It took me becoming a bedridden invalid for almost a year, before I figured out how to get stronger and pace myself better.  It also took that drop to the bottom to stop letting guilt of what I thought I should be doing go.

Not everyone reading this is at the same level of pain and fatigue.  Thirty years ago, I pushed through much of my pain and fatigue.  However, more stress and additional illnesses have taken me beyond the point that I can push myself and lead the life I did when I was younger.  FlyLady's BabySteps work for many people;  however, I admit to not being able to keep up.  I've had to learn to be flexible and work around my illness.

 It is helpful to develop your own routine:  in fact, you probably already have one.  However, I have found routines can be improved with small steps.  Decide what things work for you.  I have suggested ways to do this in previous articles.  Also, I  make suggestions on my Facebook Page, Chronic Illness and Creative Decluttering several times a week.  When I learn a new way to manage my day, I share it.  Hopefully, you will make comments, as well as sharing your ideas.  We can learn from one another.

Remember, there are not many things we use in life that are one size fits all.  I think this applies to our routines and chores as well, especially when dealing with a disability or an illness.

Finally, it takes time to make changes in your life.  Slow and sure makes a difference, even when you have a flare-up or relapse.  Habits don't change overnight, nor does clutter simply disappear.  Give yourself some positive self-talk, and throw out the negative.  It's time to find out what kind of routine works for you. 

God bless you.

Gentle Hugs,

Deborah

Bless This Mess

Jen Reynold's of Fibrotv.com wrote an  article with very practical tips and with the interview she did with me.  Hope you enjoy it.  It's called:

Bless This Mess! How To Make Cleaning Less Exhausting With Chronic Illness. (Interview with Deborah Bolton from Chronic Fatigue And Creative Decluttering Facebook Page).

Needing a House-Keeping Boost

Hello Everyone.  I went to flylady.net today for some much needed inspiration.  What a great time to do it:  it's Anti-Procrastination Day over at Marla's place.  What have you been procrastinating on? Are you ready to make some changes?

I have a boatload of stuff I need to do, but I couldn't decide what to work on first. Thank goodness for FlyLady. Going to get busy.  However, I always remember to make my list in 3's or I end up being overtired and overwhelmed.  If you have time this summer, let us know what you have accomplished.  Maybe, it is just getting a much needed break.  That is important too. Or maybe, you have had time to do something around the house you don't normally do.

In my own life, I have had a break and feel the need to get back on task.  I am starting to experience a sense of aimlessness; therefore, I went to a place I knew I would get help. FlyLady has a schedule for everyday.  I can do some of that!

Risking The Truth

Have you ever felt like you were putting yourself out there when admitting to your own weakness?  Isn't that how it feels  when you have to admit to someone, who does not quite understand your illness, that you  cannot do something or go somewhere?

When you get to the point you have to tell someone, I  do  not have the strength or the energy to go on a trip,  take that job, go out  tonight, teach that class, or volunteer in that organization -- it often feels like a huge decision, especially if it is something you  want to do.  One finds himself pulled this way and that.  Sometimes, it feels like a weight on the chest that sits there, until one is brave enough to admit this is not something he or she can do.

And then, there is the issue of being honest to help someone who suffers like you do.  The best example I can think of is what I wrote in "Digressing from Needing a Vacation." A synopsis of what I wrote goes as follows:  when you are constantly ill for years, there are moments when you might feel like you cannot take another moment of this.  This can lead to thoughts of suicide, but suicide is not the answer.  If this is a thought that plagues you, you should have psychological counseling.  It is worth the risk of being honest to tell a therapist you have had this thought.  My preference is a Christian therapist, but that because I know a Christian therapist would understand how important my faith is in my life.  There are things in life we should not have to tackle alone.  It is not failure to see a counselor that can help you manage the thoughts you have about your life in a healthier way. That is what I  call being smart and handling your illness.

Finding peace in a life that has become a daily round of illness is challenging. It sometimes feels like climbing a mountain you can never leave or being inside bars that will not let you go.  I have felt sometimes like my body has become a prison.  However, you can learn to live in a new normal. I have written about how I find that peace in God and in letting go of negative thoughts by turning them around into positive thoughts.  

Recently, I had to admit to a loved one that I couldn't spend several days visiting.  It was hard.  I did not want to call.  I was afraid of how that person would feel and whether she would understand.  But I had to do it, because I know my body.  I know I have been more ill this past winter and not yet totally  recovered. When I made the plans, I was optimistic and thinking I would be ready.  Unfortunately, this is not the case.

I had to risk telling the truth that I cannot handle the type of trip we were planning.  At least, I cannot at this time.  It was like a weight lifted when I was truthful.  I admitted my weakness and my inability to handle what would have been a fun trip during a time of feeling healthier.  I'm not saying I don't feel disappointment over not going somewhere I wanted to go.  However, I do feel peace in having been truthful.  And I have let the disappointment go. 

I have many blessings in this life.  I think I will count those, and smell the roses.  That is life-giving or life-living for me. 

Perhaps you have heard the saying:  "Have an attitude of gratitude."  Even in negative circumstances it helps one to get through tough times to count your blessings.  There are time one feels like he or she is barely hanging on, but that is part of life.  Sometimes, if I feel depressed, I tell myself it will pass.  Also, I find something to do:  I don't dwell on my feelings.  I feel them and I try to move on to put activity appropriate to my physical condition on that particular day.  

Today, I could not get motivated, but I have had some unusual things going on this week.  I considered that and a friend said, "This would be a good time to read a book."  So, I did.   No guilt.  Then, later on I took a shower and washed my hair even though I did not feel like it.  Funny how I feel better now, and I am not feeling guilty about not cooking supper or not doing housework.  Tomorrow is another day.  The world is not going to quit turning, because I didn't fix supper or didn't do the laundry.  If it was going to quit turning over my putting something off until tomorrow, we would be in lots of trouble.

Until Next Time,

Deborah