Sunday, September 2, 2012

I'm Goin' to Go to Church Today

This is going to be a short one, but I have to share.  And I'm going to ask you to pray for me, because this is a special day:  I'm going back to church again.  Yes, that sounds odd for a committed Christian and for minister's wife;  however, I have been very ill.  I have tried, when I had short remissions, but my body would not cooperate;  and I could not keep up the activity.  Also, I have had a psychological block, a phobia about going there.  Agoraphobia -- fear of the marketplace, basically fear of being around a large group of people.  Moreover, because of Fibromyalgia, it is easy for me to get over-stimulated, which leads to feeling overwhelmed and brainfog..  The thing is I have loved going to Worship my whole life, but then I got side-swiped into not being there.  I have always felt guilty about that, until God showed me I didn't have carry around an extra load of guilt.   He is healing things in my life.  Today is a new beginning.  I pray I will be able to balance my energy, and not fall back into total exhaustion.  I don't think this is a remission.   I am in a little less pain, and I feel much stronger, because I have been more active since I had my hip replacement in December of 2011.  

Right now, my eyes don't want to completely open up.  I can hardly read what I wrote.  But, I am showered and dressed, and I have my makeup on.  It's 8:30 A M.  Hallerluyah, as a friend of mine says.

Hebrews 10:24-25

And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.  New King James Version (NKJV)

A new beginning...

Breezes of change blow, and
       I know it's my time
           to surpass the limits of this weakened body.
More than a body, easily spent,
a fogging brain losing focus...
I am still me.

My spirit growing,
                seeking God's present purpose
 for my life...
                  I am content                                                                                  with each small step
     leading me closer to His will.     
Deborah Lynne Bolton  copyright 2012

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It's always lovely hearing from you. xoxo, Deborah