I don't think the fear is about cleaning off a table: it is about what I have to do after I clean off the table. I have to figure out how to keep it that way.
Do you ever have fears that unexpectedly pop up? All of a sudden, this irrational fear envelops your being.
Ask these questions:
What is the fear really about?
Has it been a hard day?
Are you on the edge of exhaustion?
It seems answering these questions might explain some aspects of fear.
What is the fear really about? I'm afraid I will let the table go again. If I use it, it will become a mess. And I am weary of trying to figure out what to shed from my life and where to put the keepers. I want everything to be simple and clear, but life doesn't always cooperate.
Has it been a hard day? Oh yes, from the very beginning. I woke up dizzy and I am walking around in a fog that I don't want to give in to. And I weighed -- I have gained all my weight back.
Are you on the edge of exhaustion? Yes. I am. I live most of my life on the edge of exhaustion, trying to overcome it.
However, as I walked out of the room with the big table, I prayed God would take me step by step down His path. I don't care how long it takes, as long as He is my guide. So now when I should be fixing supper, I close my eyes and rest, thankful for frozen dinners.