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However, I have to admit I do have an aversion to being fake, so where do I draw the line? I want to be authentic. Is there a place you draw the line?
Let's explore that by listing some of the ways we might "fake it 'til we make it." Perhaps you can add some ways you have done this in our discussion on facebook or here in our comments.
Ways I have or am working on faking it until I make it:
- I am not totally sure this applies, because it is such an ongoing thing, and I honestly do keep working at this; however, I am not completely there (wherever there is) yet. It is the area of keeping down clutter in the house. I have made such wonderful progress over the last five years in that area; however, sometimes my house gets out of hand when I am working on a project or life takes over in unexpected ways. Then, I have to regroup; and, I used to feel like I was starting all over again, but that has changed. Now, I have all the habits and things I have learned and relearned whch fall back into place so much easier than before. Moreover, I have made such great progress in getting rid of years of stuff that I think most people tend to save if they have room, which we do not have in this particular house. I am not done yet, but I am closer. And, it is actually fun when you realize that you are freer by being able to get rid of the detritus.
- Emotions is a hot topic. But, I have a body that gets that cortisol thing going when I get anxious and upset. It starts a cycle that can get out of hand, because it hurts so much. I hate that chemicals in our body have such power over our physical selves and our brains; but, I am certain that is part of my genetic makeup. And, it also is part of what makes me sensitive to how others feel. The things that help me and have helped me in the past are: prayer, scripture, relaxation techiniques, running (I can't do that now), walking on the beach or in a park, reading, even playing a game (unless the computer is fueling my anxiety), doing a crossword puzzle, cleaning house. Ha, ha, I never thought that last one would show up on my list, but if clutter is the source of the anxiety it makes me feel better to have neat and organized surroundings
My list is not exhaustive, because I only meant it as an example, and I am not so concerned with the past, so much as how this can help us now. Although, I did think about one that applies that happened to me today. My dog is super sensitive to my emotions. She even gets diarrhea when I am upset. I am pretty sure that is the connection to her tummy problem. Today, I was dealing with something that has had my cortisol flowing like crazy streams. My anxiety was palpable, like you could touch it. And, I saw her cringe. I realized she was feeling my upset. So, "Fake It Until I Make It" went into immediate action. We have a game where I say, "Let's cuddle-buddle." She jumps on the bed. I lay across it, and she gets a tummy rub. It started when I was not able to get down on the floor before my hip surgery when she was a puppy. She is the only dog that has ever been allowed on the furniture or in the bed. I realize I have totally spoiled her in that one way.
The thing is the actions I took with our dog actually helped me feel better. Now, I am writing and I feel pretty good. Admittedly, I took half of a pill for anxiety, but this time I had to. I am so glad that panic attacks are not something that regularly happen to me anymore, but I do keep my medicine on hand for the rare moments. Lately, I have cut them in half, because I so rarely need them, a whole tab makes me feel sleepy. From my view, that is progress.
I hope this helps you in some way. I can see many ways to apply Koenig's excellent article. I am so glad she reached out past her practice to help people. She could not possibly see all the people she has encouraged. Here is the link: Fake It Til You Make It Equals Practice.
I loved when she spoke on this and it's definitely me!, I would be loon-ier than normal!! After 15+ years, I had my first HUGE breakdown and anxiety attacks. Sick as a dog, I couldn't get close to being overwhelmed! I appreciate your validation. I learned keeping blood sugar in check was heloful. 4 to 5 small meals. There are correlations. I listened to my service dog and didn't let myself get overloaded. It's a long journey back,but all you do for yourself pays great dividends soon!
ReplyDeleteThanks for you candidness. Chatcat76.wordpress.com.
I realized today I need to take some of my own "medicine", rereading articles, etc. Anxiety and things that have caused it, like PTSD, hormones that are off, whatever the cause, do not just disappear, or so it seems. I wish they would. Sometimes, they get better, but other times there seem to be recurrences. Thank you for commenting. I am going to check out your blog. Hugs, Deborah
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